This blog post is my opinion.
With the birth rate declining in America, a lot of people just opt out of having children.
Each person has their own reasons for this.
When I see people saying they want children, sometimes they give very simple and short answers, like I just want kids, compared to people who don’t want children and will give a list of many reasons why they don’t want to.
It’s hard when you see someone getting baby fever only because they have a friend or see a celebrity looking cute with their baby.
I think to myself, ‘people, a baby is a human being.’ They are not just cute things. A baby will grow up and have to go to school and then try to go into the workforce. They will have to live through historical events. A lot of mental health problems are going on right now, just to name a few of the reasons you should think full circle before just wanting to have a kid.
I do believe that there are many good people and good parents, but I have seen way too many people who were not the best parents, and honestly, some that should never have been parents. I see a lot of parents who don’t see their faults and don’t see what they are doing wrong as parents and the effects on their parents.
1) Your parents always compared your childhood to theirs.
2) They had random arguments and blamed you for things that did not involve you
4) They complain about working all the time to take care of you
3) They barely talked to you and spent time with you
5) They have not fully healed from their own childhood trauma
6) Everyone thinks they are good parents besides you the child.
6) You had to grow up with them
7) They spend more time and are more attentive and caring to other people than you.
8) They wait until something bad is happening to them to pay attention to you.
9) They only wanted kids because they thought they were cute
What is your take on parenting and should everyone be a parent?
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The thing about everyone thinking they were great parents but me (the child) hit me hard. I remember sitting at my dad’s funeral listening to everybody talk about how great of a guy he was, and all I could think about is the abuse he inflicted on me and my siblings. He was apparently like that because his dad was like that with him. I don’t plan to have kids because I do not want to continue that cycle.
This is a really important post and I agree with what you said about kids not just being cute, but people that you have to care for. There are many people who have not healed themselves who unfortunately pass on so many emotional burdens onto their kids. I’m glad though with the new generation they are more self aware than my generation was (Gen X). Thanks for this article many good points.